have any lds apostles been divorced

Feelings About Plural Marriage. In contrast to the perception the Church and its leaders try to hide the Churchs past, one respondent wrote that he had previously had problems with polygamy until a general authority visited his mission and, during a question and answer period, explained the background of plural marriage. First of all, those who oppose any divorced man serving as an elder almost universally do so on the basis of the apostle Pauls language in 1 Timothy 3:2. (You didn't see President Hinckley rushing off to get married after the death of his wife Marjorie, right?). Yes, she responded, relieved that I had understood at last. Even one soul lost over the now-unpracticed principle of plural marriage is too many. Our teenage youth need to know about plural marriage, including the fact that Joseph Smith, by commandment of God, introduced the doctrine and practice of the plurality of wives. Elder Baxter later served two years as a missionary in theScotland Edinburgh Mission and served as abishop, counselor in a stake presidency, stake president, counselor in a mission presidency, and as an Area Seventy. Increase and Maria Van Dusen published a series of tell all pamphlets about the temple ceremony and polygamy during the 1840s and early 1850s. For an excellent discussion about this pivotal time period, see Gregory L. Smith, Polygamy, Prophets, and Prevarication: Frequently and Rarely Asked Questions about the Initiation, Practice, and Cessation of Plural Marriage in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, FAIR, 2005, accessed January 20, 2014, http://www.fairmormon.org/perspectives/publications/polygamy-prophets-and-prevarication. Why did he marry young teenagers, including 14-year-old Helen Mar Kimball, who had both parents and didnt want to be married?46. One guy from Japan ordered 5,000 of them for resale.20 Another alcoholic beverage company banking on the polygamy image is Five Wives Vodka, an Ogden, Utah distillery whose suggestive label displays five women in old-fashioned nightgowns.21. E-mail correspondence between [anonymous] and Craig L. Foster, February 17, 2012. The important thing to remember is that Heavenly Father loves all of you and wants the best for you, both now and in eternity. Keith L. Brown is a convert to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Participants were asked to rank from 1 to 7 the support they felt from various Church-related groups (1 being not at all supportive and 7 being very supportive). Often times in our anxiety to live Gods commandments, we focus on everything we should avoid to remain righteous. They are in violation of the civil law. What applepansy said. For example, several years ago the priesthood/Relief Society manual on the teachings of Brigham Young included a timeline of significant dates in his life, including his first marriage and his second monogamist marriage after the death of his first wife. Members were stung by the presence of those who had chosen to continue plural marriage outside of the Churchs control.3 This constant reminder to both members and the outside world has embarrassed and bothered Church officials and members alike. People need all the love and support they can get as they weather a divorce., In a message to divorced members, Dr. Swinton continues, If you have experienced divorce, don't beat yourself up or feel you are lesser in any way. Gains have been made since the days I observed palpable discomfort in missionaries and volunteers. 60. would have helped., [It] would be nice if [others] had some idea of how devastating divorce is and could have helped me get through the grieving process. I can't imagine a Seventy giving instruction that was inconsistent with Church policy. The following article originally ran on LDS Living in May 2016. Even more tragically, accidental discovery and/or inadequate teachings about the Churchs history and relationship to plural marriage have caused crises of faith which have alienated members of the Church and, in many cases, led to their eventual departure from the faith. The only safe path through a divorce is to remain true to the gospel. There is more of a stigma associated with it. Most definitely not true. Divorce disqualifies a Priesthood holder from even being a Bishop, let alone a General Authority. applepansy But one or two of the current apostles have remarried after becoming widowed.. wow I really like that.. i had no idea that you couldnt be bishop if you were divorced or unmarried. They just wanted to help., Member friends primarily provided support around the spiritual connection that could not be found with non-members. After personal reflection and prayer, Elder Scott felt impressed that he should serve a mission and was called to serve inUruguay from 1950 to 1953. When he was 12 years old, the missionaries began visiting Elder Baxter and his family, bringing a sense of goodness and peace into their home. He currently serves as the Ward Mission Leader of the Annapolis Maryland Ward. John Kitzmiller, personal interview, October 13, 2011. A couple of years ago, I was talking with one of my daughters 16-year-old friends, a descendant of LDS polygamists, and mentioned Joseph Smiths plural wives. Furthermore, if she had been learning about the Churchs polygamous history in the youth Sunday School programs, she would have had a better foundation on which to stand. The shows first season was set in Utah Valley until the Utah County police began to investigate the family. You cannot paste images directly. Indeed, some even try to dress like 19th-century Mormons, except in neo-pioneer style pastel dresses topped off with a bizarre hairstyle. WebIn their examination of the divorce rate within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, using both civil and temple marriages combined, McClendon and Chadwick Here are some suggestions that might help members avoid the potential negative impact of the Churchs plural marriage heritage.63 Members need to be taught the full history of the Church, including plural marriage from Joseph Smith into the 20th century. Most recently, Rebecca Wall Jeffs Musser, a former plural wife of Rulon Jeffs, with the assistance of award-winning author M. Bridget Cook Burch, published The Witness Wore Red: The 19th Wife Who Brought Polygamous Cult Leaders to Justice.14 This is a fascinating account of her life within and eventual escape from the FLDS, a branch of the fundamentalist movement. Elder Cook and his brother deeply respected their father and decided to talk about their father's advice. The separation before the actual divorce can often be even more embittered. His mother also remarried and was sealed in the London England Temple. Another example of anti-Mormon accusations of adulterous polyandry can be found at LDSFreedom.org, Polyandry & Joseph Smith, accessed October 12, 2011, http://www.ldsfreedom.org/node/7. That healing power and that hope are there for them and also for their children.. Surprisingly, only 4% of the respondents did not know he had plural wives. That is a significant number. It was reported that at the time of Jeffs' death at age 92 that he may have had as many as 75 wives and 65 children; however, conflicting sources indicate that Jeffs may have been survived by 19 or 20 wives and "about 60 children," including 33 sons. And while such issues might be of little interest in one stake or ward, members in a neighboring stake or ward might be very interested or have a need for further teaching and explanation. Now, in a world-wide Church such as the LDS Church, not all members will have the same need for or interest in information about the Churchs polygamous past. Most of these people, however, are just trying to find a way to react to something that is so contrary to accepted marriage patterns. Those who experience a divorce need a lot of support from others to help manage those high levels of stress. No we didn't see President Hinckley remarry. The Polygamy Porter T-shirts are our best seller, the owner explained. All of us know someone who has been divorced. E-mail correspondence between [anonymous] and Craig L. Foster, August 11, 2011. Interpreter Foundation is not owned, controlled by or affiliated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Just as a civil marriage does not automatically translate into a temple sealing for a Mormon couple, a civil divorce does not unseal them. The only safe path through a divorce is to remain true to the gospel. However, LDS members can only have one living, legal spouse while on earth. When a couple legally divorce, the temple marriage/sealing is effectively nullified, because the couple is no longer together and do not wish to be. You'll also like: What (and What Not) to Say to the Recently Divorced, Dr. Swinton agrees. Since the time of the Manifesto, there has been suspicion that Latter-day Saints still practice plural marriage.15 Rumors and stereotyping of secret Mormon polygamous marriages have continued to the present, as news commentators and political pundits alike misconstrue and misrepresent LDS history and doctrine. All research and opinions provided on this site are the sole responsibility of their respective authors, and should not be interpreted as the opinions of the Board, nor as official statements of Latter-day Saint doctrine, belief or practice. Joseph Walker, Recent Events Highlight Confusion of Polygamy, Deseret News, August 6, 2011, accessed August 7, 2011, https://www.deseret.com/2011/8/6/20208124/recent-events-highlight-confusion-of-polygamy. Therefore, leadership at different levels could decide what and where to teach its members, as well as who might be the most knowledgeable and able to teach such sensitive matters.66. In my experience as a counselor, I found that, although much of what men and women experience in divorce is the same, there are some differences: While still married, men are more likely to minimize the seriousness of marital problems. Web(Photo: KUTV) (KUTV) At least six people are suing the daughter and son-in-law of Russell M. Nelson, the president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. For more information on the Van Dusens, see Craig L. Foster, From Temple Mormon to Anti-Mormon: The Ambivalent Odyssey of Increase Van Dusen Dialogue 27/3 (1994): 27586. Some members of the LDS Church have expressed shock and puzzlement that early Church leaders such as Joseph Smith and Brigham Young would lie about plural marriages before the public announcement of the doctrine and practice. The top reason for a change in calling was relocation. Many are confronted with these issues regarding plural marriage without a firm understanding of the LDS Churchs polygamous past. Together, they made the harrowing journey past Russian guards patrolling the border to West Germany until they were safely reunited with the rest of President Uchtdorf's family. My girls did not want to go because of the way the adult sisters treated them.. For this reason, they think that the unmarried would include both the widowed, the divorced and those who have never been married. When I suggested to a volunteer at Church Hosting that we take the guests to the Beehive House, she immediately said, Oh you dont want to do that., I asked why not and she gave a nervous laugh and said, Well, you know., She gave another nervous laugh and repeated, You know. She continued, They might ask questions.. let's clarify; A divorced and remarried man can be bishop. 20. Elder DallinH. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Divorce, Ensign, May 2007, 71. For example, a number of years ago I showed some important guests around the Family History Library and then the neighboring Museum of Church History and Art, both in Salt Lake City. Sam Finley, Duck Football: From One Mission to Another, Eugene Daily News, September 16, 2011, accessed September 16, 2011, http://eugenedailynews.com/2011/09/16/duck-football-from-one-mission-to-another. A new take on the parable of the lost sheep may change how you see yourself in the church, How a perfect cherry cheese pie led to food-world fame, 6 temple dresses + accessories Latter-day Saint women will love, Other: 18% (This included: Anger, Apostasy, Sexual Abuse, Health [sick/disabled partner or child], Criminal Activity, In-Law Interference, and Homosexuality. The depth of dismay occurs in part because of the negative publicity attending Warren Jeffss marriages to under-aged brides as well as modernitys changed concept of childhood and adulthood. Another active Latter-day Saint responded: Are you suggesting that what is making you pleased is the denial of relationships in the Celestial Kingdom? A whole lesson about Doctrine and Covenants 132 and not one mention of plural marriage? I did know one who was released when he and his wife were separated. Let's try this: the First Presidency must approve of all people who are called as Bishop. Church policy, however, does have a preference to married men as bishops. 38. Any righteous, willing, and worthy man may be bishop regardless of his marital status. These details (in part) caused me to lose my testimony.40. One convert, who joined at age 24, wasnt told about the Churchs polygamist past until after he was baptized. January 10, 2009 in LDS Gospel Discussion. 10. As a youth, Elder Scott would attend Church occasionally with friends or with the encouragement of home teachers and bishops. Raised on Essentials in Church History and similar volumes and never hearing of Joseph Smiths own plural relationships in general conferences or in other official publications, the new public memory began to take root.22. Thats just how it is.62. From the time of its introduction, plural marriage has been wrapped in controversy. not true. Although a strong marriage is the ideal, some marriages unfortunately end in divorce. Plural marriage continued to be practiced in the open until the anti-polygamy persecution of the 1880s and the issuance of the Manifesto in 1890. Those members of the church who are personally affected by the policy change and have questions are encouraged to talk to their local priesthood leaders," he said. These and other negative claims against early Mormon polygamy have caused understandable mental and spiritual turmoil for members. The Salt Lake Tribune reviewed the party affiliation of all 15 apostles for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints including the three-member First I thought everyone knew we no longer practice plural marriage, so I played along with him. Im angry that they have broken up our family. I never expected it, but it happened, and I accept it. The practice suffered a slow, difficult death as the Church and its members came to terms with the demise of the practice and yet continued their efforts to keep what they regarded as a sacred principle alive. (Photo courtesy of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) Apostle Ronald A. Rasband speaks at General Conference on Easter Sunday, April 4, 2021. Elder Cook also served a mission from 1960 to 1962, serving in the British Mission with Elder Jeffrey R. Holland as one of his companions. But heres a fact you need to know: children can be Your previous content has been restored. Polygamy in the Spotlight, e-mail correspondence, July 14, 2011. The manual emphasized that plural marriage should not be the focus of the lesson. On the positive side, unlike earlier Sunday School manual referred to, the online version of the latest Sunday School manual includes an explanation and discussion points about plural marriage. Throughout his life, Elder Oaks admired his mother's fortitude and ability to raise her children in the gospel. And when he was 15 years old, Elder Cook experienced something that would draw from both lessons. When he was 15 years old, Elder Baxter says he looked back on the challenges his family faced in his younger yearsalcoholism, divorce, povertyall of the things he couldn't change in his past and decided, "I will change the futurefor myself and for the children I will someday have. The LDS Church leadership already does a very good job of listening to and trying to address the needs of its members. Elder Baxter says his mother was "happy, content, and fulfilled until overtaken by mortality" during her marriage for nearly 25 years until she passed away. I became a pariah. Before Elder Dallin H. Oaks was 8 years old, his father passed away from tuberculosis, leaving his mother, Stella H. Oaks, to care for three children on her own. In many ways, Fundamentalist Mormons are like Latter-day Saints former relativesex-uncles or crazy former cousins who cause embarrassment and discomfort, for they remind us of a married past we would rather forget. I asked my husband. The survey was not random, as people were contacted by e-mail and on Facebook and asked to participate and to spread the word among their LDS family and friends. This is true even if your parents temple sealing to each other is canceled. Church leaders were instructed to read the letter in LDS sacrament meetings. While steps have been taken to inoculate members, more can be done. Many survey respondents noted that they felt most accepted and supported by nonmembers because they were not judgmental and there is less of a stigma around divorce in the outside world. Those who have been divorced have experienced great pain. 15. For examples of accusations of Joseph Smith and pedophilia, see Smith, Nauvoo Polygamy; Mark Webster, Hes a Dangerous Man: God Talk and Sexual Abuse, Beyond Opinion.com: Christian Apologetics Ministry, December 13, 2010, accessed October 14, 2011, http://beyondopinion.com/tag/joseph-smith/; and Sandra Tanner, Joseph Smith as a Sexual Predator, Mormon Coffee: Its Forbidden But its Good, June 21, 2009, accessed October 12, 2011, http://blog.mrm.org/2009/06/joseph-smith-as-a-sexual-predator/. 27. . 2. Brigham Young might have done that, but Joseph Smith never would. I let the subject drop. You can post now and register later. Unfortunately, she was not alone in being shocked to learn Joseph Smith had plural wives. For that matter, it may not even be as important to Saints residing in the eastern parts of Canada and the United States as it is to those residing in the western United States. I remember a fifth or sixth grade classmate who came to my central California elementary school and said, Youre a Mormon, right? I answered in the affirmative, and he then announced, My father says Mormons can have more than one wife. All content by The Interpreter Foundation, unless otherwise specified, is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. 29. His mother remarried, but Elder Baxter's stepfather was "not a good man" and times were difficult(Elder David S. Baxter, "Finding Hope in a Troubled Family," August 2015 "New Era"). Interestingly enough, 5 of the respondents were from England, with at least 3 of them identifying themselves as fundamentalist Mormons. There Stephen C. Taysom, A Uniform and Common Recollection: Joseph Smiths Legacy, Polygamy, and the Creation of Mormon Public Memory, 1852 2002, Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought 35/3 (Fall 2002): 136. 32. For more on this topic, check outFinding Wholeness and Happiness after Divorce. When are you going to be baptized?" The midwestern United States also had a good representation, as did Canada (especially western Canada). If two men are available to be bishop and they are equally qualified in every way except one man is married and the other is not, you can expect the married man to receive the call. Rebecca Musser and M. Bridget Cook, The Witness Wore Red: The 19th Wife Who Brought Polygamous Cult Leaders to Justice (New York: Grand Central Publishing, 2013). Men tend to be action oriented, so they may be less inclined to seek counseling and instead bury their feelings by working long hours or immersing themselves in a hobby. Claire, e-mail correspondence, October 4, 2011. 16. Display as a link instead, If my parents were sealed in the temple and then got divorced, which one am I sealed to? ok now i am confused can you be one of the twelve apostles if you have been divorced does it matter if you remarried, has there been any of the twelve apostles that have been divorced or could you be one of the twelve apostles if you have been divorced i want to make sure i am not misrepresenting the LDS position. Elder Scott's father, who was not a member at the time, was particularly fond of his 2-year-old grandson and was heartbroken at his passing. Foster, Like Two Crazy Aunts in the Attic.. Jana Riess, My Polygamous Heaven . The percentage with very unfavorable feelings toward plural marriage was the highest among the possible unfavorable, including possible unfavorable feelings toward the LDS Church. In a message to divorced members, Dr. Swinton continues, If you have experienced divorce, don't beat yourself up or feel you are lesser in any way. It is within this milieu of multifarious information and misinformation that modern members of the Church are placed. [Page 71]. Joseph Smiths marriages to teenagers have increasingly become a stumbling block to faithful members. A number of years later I was organizing a visit of some dignitaries to Salt Lake City. "We always talk about fathers blessing their children and performing the ordinances, and those are wonderful experiences. Of course, the teachings should be simple and matter-of-fact information such as mentioning in passing that early Church leaders like Joseph Smith and Brigham Young, as well as other early members of the Church, were commanded by God to have more than one wife. His first thought was, What a dumb idea, why would anyone want more than one woman telling him what to do?36 Another convert who did not learn about plural marriage was a woman who was distressed about the very thought of having [to] share my husband with another. It bothered her enough that she discussed it with other members, and she was told to pray about it. Brigham Young had a well publicized divorce. It is not my place to advise Church leaders on how to handle this problem and, therefore, these suggestions should be seen as suchsimple suggestions that might help. However, it is obvious more needs to be done to answer the questions and concerns of members of all ages. Pay attention to the children who are going through a really bad time. David Grua, From Embrace to Embarrassment: Remembering Joseph Smiths Polygamy, The Juvenile Instructor (November 2, 2007), accessed August 24, 2011, http://www.juvenileinstructor.org/from-embrace-to-embarrassment-remembering-joseph-smiths-polygamy/. If the Lord chooses a divorced man to be bishop, that man will be bishop. 11. To his knowledgge this policy came from the Area Seventy. Copy in authors possession. However, it wasn't until years after Elder Bednar's mission and after he was married that his he received an answer to the question he had been asking his father all those years when his father called him to ask, "What are you doing this Saturday? I told them I would be glad to answer any question they had. WebOn their own initiative, some couples separated or divorced as a result of the Manifesto; other husbands stopped cohabiting with all but one of their wives but continued to provide financial and emotional support to all dependents. !45 Another womans exit letter from the Church had a series of accusatory questions including, Why did Smith marry and have sex with 11 women who were married to other men at the same time, some of whom he sent away on missions before marrying their wives? Faithful historians and scholars can and should continue to study the Churchs polygamous past in order to help members better understand and appreciate the complex history of Mormon polygamy. These are truly touching and delicate experiences that members of the Church endured as they divorced. [Page 45]Abstract: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saintss uncomfortable relationship with its polygamous history is somewhat like an awkward marriage separation. 2023 The Interpreter Foundation. Copy in authors possession. It is also important to differentiate a man who was divorced and remarried before he became a Christian from a man who was divorced and remarried after becoming a Christian. 7. Even if the situation is uncomfortable or you dont know how to react, love them. I am not sure that those that faithfully practiced it many years ago would be with that conclusiondo you? Web38.1. but we called it celestial marriage (Salt Lake City: Signature Books, 2008); and Richard S. Van Wagoner, Mormon Polygamy: A History (Salt Lake City: Signature Books, 1986). On a positive note, the LDS Church has recently taken a more active approach to interpreting and defining its polygamous past. 48. Plural marriage has proven to be a prime weapon because a little of the truth can be devastating. Nate Oman on Jeffs, August 25, 2011. Lets dive into the New Testament and see what we can learn about the efforts of the original apostles to maintain a full quorum. 8. When he was 5 years old, Elder Baxter's mother and father divorced. But unfortunately, this would not be the last time President Uchtdorf's family would have to leave behind everything. In the Church, we value family relationships so much (rightly so) that many dont know how to deal with divorce because it seems incongruent with the foundation of the Church, which is the family. There were 400 respondents, with a little over half being male. Though faced with overwhelming hardships and challenges, these general authorities gained a stronger testimony of the Savior and the importance of families while overcoming incredibly trying family situations.

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